America looks at everything as if it simply comes and then it abruptly goes. Nothing ever just is. For about a period of two or three years all anyone seemed to care about was bullying. The only reason the fiasco started up was because someone “important” took a leap of faith and didn’t come out alive. Putting a stop to bullying was a trend. Schools were having an unprecedented amount of Stop Bullying and Don’t Jump assemblies. Memorials were crowding our neighborhoods and bullies were being bullied. (Not the right reaction.) What people don’t seem to understand is, even after that period of time, people still get beaten down physically and mentally all the time. What even more people don’t seem to understand is that everyone is capable of being victim to these vile hurt people, not just children or people going to school. No matter how old you are or where you are, bullying exists. Now don’t be discouraged because of this. Bullying has always existed since the beginning of time and somehow we have held up until someone decided enough was enough. People get angry and do things they don’t mean to. People have bad days. This is exactly why everyone needs to know how to deal with it, who to go to if it’s happening, and how not to be one, because not all bullies know they are bullying. Bullying has seriously always existed, sometimes famously, so why start getting all scared because of one incident that got recognized. It’s like saying the good kids are the bad kids that don’t get caught. All people are capable of being bullies just a few get caught.
The Moth Effect
The most important aspect to start with is how to deal with bullying if it is happening to you. Let’s start with this, you aren’t ugly, you aren’t stupid, and you are better than they ever could be. Nobody deserves to be told they are something they aren’t. The only person who can truly hurt you is you, so don’t take their words to heart. If you sit there and think about what they said and try to apply it, then you are helping them achieve their goal of the complete destruction of the happiness of others. This is the moth effect. When you see a moth flying around it is normal flying around a light. If you turn off that light and turn on another one the moth normally tends to fly towards the new light. If someone is using mean words to describe you or if someone is yelling at you, look at what they said to you and see if maybe the words they used to describe you actually fit them. Then you will realize that all those nasty words they said were once put on them and now instead of brushing it off or going to someone who could help them they are trying to pick those words up off of themselves and throw them at you. Don’t let them stick to you. Turn off that light that is attracting them to you and turn on another one somewhere else. If you refuse to react they will move on to someone else who will. While it isn’t great for them to go and pick on someone else, if everyone refuses to react, the bully will have to give up eventually. Honestly, that bully probably just needs a hug. Of course, this is all vocal bullying. If it is getting physical and someone is throwing punches at you it still isn’t your fault. Nobody deserves to be beaten down. If you throw punches back then you might as well join the bully club, however, if you walk away they might go running after you, so here is what to do. If someone is throwing punches and hitting or kicking or just physically inflicting any type of pain on you, first, you need to contact someone. Call a friend, text your parents, page a coworker. Get someone else there to help. Now, try sitting there. Take the punches. Feel those ripples of pain pulsing and know that you are taking one for the team. The key here is to use the moth effect and hopefully they will run off after just one or two hits. If you cry they will do it harder, if you laugh they will do it harder. Just sit there with no expression and take a punch. Hopefully they will stop, if they don’t stop, run. Just run. Nobody is judging you. Lastly, if it comes to a stage of violence where you know you might not come out alive then you need to really call someone. Dial 911 or call a friend or your parents. Trust me, the moment they see people coming that bully is out of there. If for some reason there is no way out, just stay alive, and know everything is going to be okay. Please refer to the following website if you feel you are at any risk-
Okay. Dear Bully,
Stop. You aren’t some fancy hot shot and in the long run you arent going to feel better. You are causing more pain. Is that really what you want to do? Do you really want someone else to feel the way you do? If you really aren’t hurting and you aren’t bullying because of a poor home life or personal situation then you just need to find a new outlet. Try painting or scrapbooking or video games or reading or travelling. There is so much out there you could be doing and your picking on someone? You deserve to be happy just as much as the next person. If you need someone to talk to, we have a contact form that you are welcome to contact us by. Life wasn’t made to be mean. So, in hopes of encouraging you to be a better person or to get out and try something new, I hope you will watch the video included. Life matters, your life matters, and whoever you are picking on, their life matters too.
For The Uneducated
War is bullying. Protest is bullying. Petition is bullying. In these cases someone somewhere is getting hurt, let it be opinion or feelings. All of our important leaders have been bullies. In all these scenarios someone was given the title of hero for being mean to someone. We used to have systems of people, from slaves to royalty, we were once all treated as animals by a dictator or ruled by an undemocratic force. There are so many forms of bullying and history simply goes to show exactly that. Don’t take bullying lightly and dont let bullying be a phase or a trend. Someone somewhere is in pain, mental or physical, because of another person or event. Do what you can to be nice to everyone. Each person has their own story and their own troubles. Get to know someone new or talk to someone you didn’t think you would get along with. It takes one hello. Take that step. Read more about bullying online. Read about what you can do, how you can help, and where you need to take action. Everyone deserves to be loved. I love you all, so please understand that someone somewhere loves you.
If you are being bullied please take action by telling someone close to you. You are loved and don’t you ever feel like you can’t go to anyone when it seems like the person bullying you is the only person you have. There is always someone willing to help.
By: Emma Sue Sims